This day started off as a rough one. I was lacking energy and motivation and faking faith in my head. Telling God was He needed to provide for me while doing nothing to show I had any sort of care about what I required. I am taking an Education class right now, and for this Education class I've had to get a bunch of FBI/government clearances. I've had to get a TB shot, fingerprinting, and more. All of our clearances are due this coming Monday or we will be dropped from the class. I had not been worried about this until I realized one of my clearances was missing. My Child Abuse clearance results had still not arrived in the mail and I needed it for Monday. I went to check the mailbox twice today to see if the mail had come and when it finally did there was no clearance letter. It was time to take desperate measures. I phoned the Harrisburg Child Abuse clearance office in hopes of finding someone to help. Yet, after speaking to the woman she told me that my paperwork had not been processed yet and there was no way I would receive it on Monday in time for my class. She told me I could drive in on Monday with another application and appeal for an emergency clearance, but still I would not make it back in time for my class. I took down the information for how to get to the building in Harrisburg, but there was still no guarantee.
Now I was sorely distressed. I sent an e-mail to my teacher informing her of my predicament. Then I sat there in front of my computer distressed and scared. If I was dropped from this class it could mean delaying my graduation time as well as state grant money. Foolishly, I wept for a few minutes staring at my computer. Suddenly, a thought popped into my head... something I'd told a friend only 2 nights ago. "God is always in control, He knows what He is doing." He knows what he's doing.... for a few moments I repeated it over and over in my head. Then, I realized how stupid I was being. What a silly thing to be crying over. People all over the world were suffering from far worse than a college course. Then I realized I was being even more stupid by just sitting there waiting for my teacher to e-mail me back. Take action! A voice inside my head screamed to me.
I scrambled through my notebook from school, trying to compose myself, to find the office number of my teacher. I called and the secretary answered informing me my teacher only works on the days we have classes. I told the secretary that I had a question about Education clearances and she gave me the number of the head professor in the Education department. So I called the number and explained to the professor why I was so stressed.
"Oh, that's not a problem," she informed me, "If you have your money order receipt, you'll be fine. That's all we need until your clearance comes back through." For a moment I was speechless.
"That's all I need?" I asked barely daring to hope it would be that easy, for sitting right in front of me next to my computer was my money order receipt.
"Yep, until your official clearance comes through." I thanked her profusely then did something I never imagined I'd do. I fell to the floor of my bedroom and wept.
"Thank you, God. Thank you, thank you, thank you..." Over and over again, face to the floor. Weeping with joy and humility. How could I have doubted or feared when the God who parted the Red Sea, who rose from the dead, who brought this whole world into existence was on my side. I don't know that I've ever felt so grateful, or humbled in my entire life. Sometimes we need to be reminded how REAL God isOver something so simple, I was taught a powerful lesson today. When I turned my fear and doubt over to God... He provided. He always provides.