"Short for Information Technology, and pronounced as separate letters, the broad subject concerned with all aspects of managing and processing information, especially within a large organization or company using computers. Because computers are central to information management, computer departments within companies and universities are often called IT departments" (Source).
2. Yes, I work here. Yes, I am a girl. Yes, I know what I’m doing. Can we get started with your problems now?
3. Oh, and learn my name. IT Babe, Girl, Computer Chick, or “Hey you” does NOT flatter my intelligence… or help the status of your computer issues.
4. No, I don’t actually say “Have you tried turning it off and on again” just to quote the people from the movies. Half the time that’s actually the problem.
5. Yes, my boss is scary, but he’s crazy good, too. Be respectful and make sure you let him know his time is valuable to you and he’ll do miracles, I promise. (But yes, when he gets mad, even if it’s not with me, I still pray for my mortal soul.)
6. No, I don’t remember what you set your password to six months ago—and no, the new one will not meet the requirements. (No, you can’t use your name.)
7. No, I can’t get that document that you didn’t save back. You didn’t save it… it’s gone. Sorry.
8. Dropped it in the toilet? It fell out of your backpack? You lent it to your friend? You ran over it with your car?
No, I’m not going to ask how your computer ended up in this condition, but you can bet my co-workers and I are going to talk about it when you’re gone. Yes, we probably think you’re an idiot.
9. If I hear one more old person tell me, “I swear all computers are the devil!” I’m going to program their computer so that every time it goes to sleep it flashes a giant “666” at them because—SERIOUSLY PEOPLE, if you listened to me you wouldn’t keep coming back with issues.
10. Truth is we have about a 50/50 ratio of people who have good phone skills. Some of us are great at it, and some of us are downright embarrassing. Some of us would have made very successful livings as secretaries… most of us wouldn’t. You get used to it.
11. No, I’m not going to tell you how to illegally watch TV shows and movies that have not even been released yet… It’s illegal and I don’t believe in corruption… but if you want to know, that movie was really good and you should see it in theatres soon.
12. Just because you deleted your history doesn’t mean I can’t still see what you’ve been doing on your computer. So just DON’T, okay? If you’ve got something to hide you’d be better off buying a new computer. Yes, I am that good.
And while we are on this subject, have the decency to change your background picture when I come to fix your computer. At least to something a little less… offensive? Seeing half-dressed pictures of your significant other does not make my day like it makes yours… or if it’s not even that. In truth, I could have lived my whole life not knowing you were a grown adult obsessed with My Little Pony.
13. No, you should not have clicked that link from that random email you didn’t recognize. It’s now a really annoying virus that I can get off, but it’s going to be a lot of work that was easily avoided. DON’T CLICK THE LINK.
14. Don’t, I beg you, please don’t bring your laptop to us with “viruses” if you don’t have an antivirus protector. Because, just NO.
15. Why yes! Of course I can give you <fill in the blank> for free! I totally have an unlimited budget and loads of extras kept back just for you.
16. If you don’t know anything about Star Wars, Star Trek, Marvel Comics, The Lord of the Rings, Doctor Who or any other (amazing) Sci-fi/fantasy film or television shows, then please don’t even bring up the topic. Truth is you will walk away from this conversation with more information than any one person would ever need to know on the aforesaid subject—and while it’s my obsession, I will be sitting behind my computer embarrassed that I just talked about nerdy for over an hour… Long story short, if you don’t have at least two hours to discuss, argue, and analyze, don’t even mention nerdy topics…
17. Also, your computer will be returned to you in a better condition than when it arrived—and may or may not smell like lemon cleaner—I don’t even want to know what you were eating over this thing.
18. Don’t EVER think that just because I work in IT that I can’t take you in a fight. You have no idea what kind of insane bicep muscles I’ve gained from carrying heavy computers across this campus multiple times a day. Truth is that just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean I can’t carry the same or more than any one of the guys. And I will get it down there faster and more orderly as well.
19. Make me angry and you may or may not be able to connect to the Internet every again.
20. Not that you asked, but no, we don’t get thanked enough and sometimes it’s frustrating. Yes, I actually do have days where I love my job, but it’s not because of you. You don’t know this, but IT people can be some of the funniest, wisest, most generous people I’ve ever met. Make sure you tell them they’re appreciated because they’re really good at what they do and you depend on them a lot more than you realize.